011106- Jordan Ang ! Notti FellaMum, do you remember I often told you that I would like to stay single and you will always give me that " See who's going to take care of you when you grow older look " You were worried that I may eventually stay true to what I said and stay single all my life and so... decided to adopt our neighbour's baby which is this little boy.....as my godson....but you were worried that I may not like him thus adopted boy's mum as your adopted daughter instead.......So I unofficially had a "sister" to take care of me ...and a "nephew" instead of a godson..but I still would have preferred to have him as my "Godson".The baby "Jordan" which you took care when he was very very young and dotes him like anything has grown up to be a very handsome boy. He calls me "Uncle" or "Jiu Jiu" and is very close to me. From time to time, he will call me if i had taken my dinner, if I am visiting him at Granny's place, if i have visited you. He misses you too. Whenever I asked him if he remembers "por por" he says yes and often ask about your "new house" which is where we kept your "URN". I took a lot of pictures with him. The only regret I have is that I did not have a lot of pictures taken with you and him. He will grow up to be a very smart boy...During Ching Ming Festival, when we visited you, he cried for you....He is such a filial boy...
311006- I pulled the plug on my mother...
Mum, remember I told you that I submitted an article to remember you by ? It's published today. I hope this is a timely birthday present for you. All these years of taking care of me, I would like to say I love you very much and misses you a lot... I never said this before to you when you were alive and I hope that its never too late to say that now....
On 30/10/06, Yvonne Lim ( MediaCorp Press ) wrote:
IN MEMORIUM: LEE HWEE HUA, 66, Mother
Melvin Tan Kok Liang
Oct 20, 2006. Today is my birthday and on Oct 26, it will be yours, Mother. I dedicate this tribute to you.
IT HAS been a year and seven months since you passed away and I am still mourning you. I was your only child, and you lavished your love on me and devoted yourself to bringing up a good son. We were not rich, but I was not deprived. You made sure I had the best, not just in material terms but in maternal love.
I remember in my primary school days, we illegally converted our one-room flat in Toa Payoh into a makeshift hairdressing salon. Business was brisk, but eventually our house was raided by the authorities. During those tough times, I tagged along as we went door to door to promote your services in the estate.
You took such good care of all your customers, young and old, throughout the years, that even when we shifted to our three-room flat in Hougang, you were popularly known as Ah Hua, that dian mo jie (hairdresser) in Hougang Blk 23. Your Toa Payoh customers continued visiting you there.
Everyone in the neighbourhood knew how thrifty you were – how you would walk to and from the wet market, to save on bus fare. You saved up every cent and single-handedly managed the household budget. I never had to go hungry, never had to worry about my school fees or having a roof over my head.
As I grew older, I realised the things you did for our family, the values you lived by. On top of taking care of the family, you also took it on yourself to look after both my grandmothers through their golden years. Though we never actually sat down and talked about such things, I learnt about integrity and honesty from the way you lived.
“Live within your means” was your motto and you did just that. You never travelled (once, I followed some relatives to Genting, but you didn’t follow as you thought two air tickets was too expensive). You never got into debt. You believed a simple life was a virtue unto itself.
You never skimped when it came to food for the family, yet you skimped on your own material needs. The many bags that I bought you were carefully wrapped in layers and layers of newspapers... never used.
For 46 years, you slogged for the family, and when my hair salon business and overseas ventures did not do too well, you were the one who bailed me out without ever asking questions.
You encouraged me to try again, to never give up my dreams, but also to never forget those who helped me. I was 30 then. Whenever we went to the temple, you would leave coins for the needy. Your lesson to me was to donate whatever I could, and not only when I am called upon to do so. Indeed, the way you helped others through small gestures, all the time, endeared you to many neighbours and friends.
As the years passed, you were diagnosed with high blood pressure. But you did not want me to worry – you would often brush aside your dizziness as a minor headache. The day you fainted at home and was rushed to hospital, I knew it too late -- that I had not done my part as a son, to diligently check on your health. I had taken it for granted that you would take care of yourself.
My heart sank when the doctor asked us to prepare for the worst, as you had gone into a deep coma due to a burst blood vessel. As the only child, the decision to pull you off the life-support system fell to me. I had been showered with all your love – how could I possibly make that decision?
I hesitated for a long, long time. The doctor told us we were prolonging your suffering, and that the chances of your recovering were very slim. After much emotional struggle, we asked the doctor to reassure us that they had done everything they could for you.
Then we let you go.
As I stood by my cousin, the nurse unplugged the life support system. Your heartbeat slowed gradually. I cried for the longest time and held your body. I begged, I cried, I tugged at you, hoping you would miraculously show some movement.
You left us on March 31, 2005, at 2.17pm.
A year and a half have passed. It has never felt like you have truly left me. As I move on without you, I will always remember how you left me the best thing you could – your name, and everything good thing that it stood for. Ah Hua, that Hougang blk 23 “dian mo jie”.
Dear Mum, I love you and miss you.
271006 - I will take care of Granny..
Mum, when you were in ICU, I promised you that I will take good care of Granny should you leave us. Granny is well and fine, though she fell down once, she has since recovered and is in the pink of health. She does not know that you left already. I visited her every weekend and spend time playing cards with her. Its her favourite game :) Now, she thinks Ah Yi is my mum...everyone loves her..so dont worry about her. Just like how you have taken care of Ah Ma till her golden years..I will take care of Granny till her golden years....
261006- Happy Birthday Mum! Happy Birthday Mum !!! Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to Mummy, Happy Birthday to You.....Its your BIG day....Hope you are having loads of fun up there..I took leave and spend some time to catch up with my sleep and fix my notebook before..err....taking a cab to the temple to visit you. I knew you will say...aiya..why take cab again..waste money....:X...I will try not to do it again...Did you see the flowers that I bought for you ? I got it at Bishan. The lady wasnt too friendly though..Hmp !! She did not even asked me who the flowers are for...I was looking for carnations but they do not have it ...So I bought what's there..A small bouquet of rose...I din know that last year Mother's Day, I also bought rose !!!
Hope you had the joyous time of your life on this special day...
On your special day, I have something to confess..Though I do not know if its against the Chinese Tradition to do that but I did it anyway. I just couldn't let you go. I guess Auntie and Dad and the rest of the relatives din know about it.
11/2 years back after the cremation while we are picking up your bones to be placed in the urn,I secretly took some memories of you and kept it in a red packet and transferred it to a special "URN" together with some of your favourite belongings and put it inside our Punggol House. Its inside the cabinet drawer.
It has your favourite white pendant that I bought for you years back, the colour pearls + the crystal bracelet that Cousin Tina did for you. You wore it everyday until the day you were admitted to hospital.
Remember I told you that I saw an article that was written by a guy to remember his mum who passed on? After reading his article, I wrote about you, your life, my childhood and how you raised me..I never expected it to be accepted though..Just thought that I would write something for you on my birthday...
Surprise Surprise, the editor Ms Yvonne from Today's emailed me asking me some details about you. It was so unexpected...as I din think the article would be selected. I hope its the best birthday present for you Mum..
She told me it would be either published on 30th or 31st Oct 06. I am keenly looking forward to it. I will let you see when I get a copy.
221006- My Birthday and Your Birthday
Mum....I turned 37 years old 2 days ago and in another 4 days...its your birthday...I did not exactly celebrate and I din felt that it was a day to celebrate though...As usual, I went to work. Got lots of sms from friends who wish me this special day....Most of them who sms me are friends that did not contact me for a while but that gesture brings a smile on my face...The most surprise call was Francesco. A swiss guy that I knew from the chat room years back. He came to Singapore every other 2 years and we have been keeping in touch.
I am getting along fine Mum and I wish you are too...I felt much better after talking to Josephine. A close friend from the US. She is coming back to SG next year Jan and we will be catching up with each other again.
Its been a sad 2 yrs for me after you left but I am moving along....and you wont want to see me mourning you for the rest of my life...I am sure you want me to move along too...
....I love you Mum....I love you so much....
The other day I saw an article that was written to Today's. It was written by a guy who wants to remember his Mum. It was on my birthday date that I spotted that article. I send my thoughts in too...to remember you by...I hope it gets published...
You left the very BEST for me MUM ! You left your GOOD NAME and LEGACY for me... I
You were the best Mum ! Just like the rest of the Mum's in this world...Love...
See ya on the 26.10.06
311006- I pulled the plug on my mother...
Mum, remember I told you that I submitted an article to remember you by ? It's published today. I hope this is a timely birthday present for you. All these years of taking care of me, I would like to say I love you very much and misses you a lot... I never said this before to you when you were alive and I hope that its never too late to say that now....
On 30/10/06, Yvonne Lim ( MediaCorp Press )
IN MEMORIUM: LEE HWEE HUA, 66, Mother
Melvin Tan Kok Liang
Oct 20, 2006. Today is my birthday and on Oct 26, it will be yours, Mother. I dedicate this tribute to you.
IT HAS been a year and seven months since you passed away and I am still mourning you. I was your only child, and you lavished your love on me and devoted yourself to bringing up a good son. We were not rich, but I was not deprived. You made sure I had the best, not just in material terms but in maternal love.
I remember in my primary school days, we illegally converted our one-room flat in Toa Payoh into a makeshift hairdressing salon. Business was brisk, but eventually our house was raided by the authorities. During those tough times, I tagged along as we went door to door to promote your services in the estate.
You took such good care of all your customers, young and old, throughout the years, that even when we shifted to our three-room flat in Hougang, you were popularly known as Ah Hua, that dian mo jie (hairdresser) in Hougang Blk 23. Your Toa Payoh customers continued visiting you there.
Everyone in the neighbourhood knew how thrifty you were – how you would walk to and from the wet market, to save on bus fare. You saved up every cent and single-handedly managed the household budget. I never had to go hungry, never had to worry about my school fees or having a roof over my head.
As I grew older, I realised the things you did for our family, the values you lived by. On top of taking care of the family, you also took it on yourself to look after both my grandmothers through their golden years. Though we never actually sat down and talked about such things, I learnt about integrity and honesty from the way you lived.
“Live within your means” was your motto and you did just that. You never travelled (once, I followed some relatives to Genting, but you didn’t follow as you thought two air tickets was too expensive). You never got into debt. You believed a simple life was a virtue unto itself.
You never skimped when it came to food for the family, yet you skimped on your own material needs. The many bags that I bought you were carefully wrapped in layers and layers of newspapers... never used.
For 46 years, you slogged for the family, and when my hair salon business and overseas ventures did not do too well, you were the one who bailed me out without ever asking questions.
You encouraged me to try again, to never give up my dreams, but also to never forget those who helped me. I was 30 then. Whenever we went to the temple, you would leave coins for the needy. Your lesson to me was to donate whatever I could, and not only when I am called upon to do so. Indeed, the way you helped others through small gestures, all the time, endeared you to many neighbours and friends.
As the years passed, you were diagnosed with high blood pressure. But you did not want me to worry – you would often brush aside your dizziness as a minor headache. The day you fainted at home and was rushed to hospital, I knew it too late -- that I had not done my part as a son, to diligently check on your health. I had taken it for granted that you would take care of yourself.
My heart sank when the doctor asked us to prepare for the worst, as you had gone into a deep coma due to a burst blood vessel. As the only child, the decision to pull you off the life-support system fell to me. I had been showered with all your love – how could I possibly make that decision?
I hesitated for a long, long time. The doctor told us we were prolonging your suffering, and that the chances of your recovering were very slim. After much emotional struggle, we asked the doctor to reassure us that they had done everything they could for you.
Then we let you go.
As I stood by my cousin, the nurse unplugged the life support system. Your heartbeat slowed gradually. I cried for the longest time and held your body. I begged, I cried, I tugged at you, hoping you would miraculously show some movement.
You left us on March 31, 2005, at 2.17pm.
A year and a half have passed. It has never felt like you have truly left me. As I move on without you, I will always remember how you left me the best thing you could – your name, and everything good thing that it stood for. Ah Hua, that Hougang blk 23 “dian mo jie”.
Dear Mum, I love you and miss you.
271006 - I will take care of Granny..
Mum, when you were in ICU, I promised you that I will take good care of Granny should you leave us. Granny is well and fine, though she fell down once, she has since recovered and is in the pink of health. She does not know that you left already. I visited her every weekend and spend time playing cards with her. Its her favourite game :) Now, she thinks Ah Yi is my mum...everyone loves her..so dont worry about her. Just like how you have taken care of Ah Ma till her golden years..I will take care of Granny till her golden years....
261006- Happy Birthday Mum! Happy Birthday Mum !!! Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to You, Happy Birthday to Mummy, Happy Birthday to You.....Its your BIG day....Hope you are having loads of fun up there..I took leave and spend some time to catch up with my sleep and fix my notebook before..err....taking a cab to the temple to visit you. I knew you will say...aiya..why take cab again..waste money....:X...I will try not to do it again...Did you see the flowers that I bought for you ? I got it at Bishan. The lady wasnt too friendly though..Hmp !! She did not even asked me who the flowers are for...I was looking for carnations but they do not have it ...So I bought what's there..A small bouquet of rose...I din know that last year Mother's Day, I also bought rose !!!
Hope you had the joyous time of your life on this special day...
On your special day, I have something to confess..Though I do not know if its against the Chinese Tradition to do that but I did it anyway. I just couldn't let you go. I guess Auntie and Dad and the rest of the relatives din know about it.
11/2 years back after the cremation while we are picking up your bones to be placed in the urn,I secretly took some memories of you and kept it in a red packet and transferred it to a special "URN" together with some of your favourite belongings and put it inside our Punggol House. Its inside the cabinet drawer.
It has your favourite white pendant that I bought for you years back, the colour pearls + the crystal bracelet that Cousin Tina did for you. You wore it everyday until the day you were admitted to hospital.
Remember I told you that I saw an article that was written by a guy to remember his mum who passed on? After reading his article, I wrote about you, your life, my childhood and how you raised me..I never expected it to be accepted though..Just thought that I would write something for you on my birthday...
Surprise Surprise, the editor Ms Yvonne from Today's emailed me asking me some details about you. It was so unexpected...as I din think the article would be selected. I hope its the best birthday present for you Mum..
She told me it would be either published on 30th or 31st Oct 06. I am keenly looking forward to it. I will let you see when I get a copy.
221006- My Birthday and Your Birthday
Mum....I turned 37 years old 2 days ago and in another 4 days...its your birthday...I did not exactly celebrate and I din felt that it was a day to celebrate though...As usual, I went to work. Got lots of sms from friends who wish me this special day....Most of them who sms me are friends that did not contact me for a while but that gesture brings a smile on my face...The most surprise call was Francesco. A swiss guy that I knew from the chat room years back. He came to Singapore every other 2 years and we have been keeping in touch.
I am getting along fine Mum and I wish you are too...I felt much better after talking to Josephine. A close friend from the US. She is coming back to SG next year Jan and we will be catching up with each other again.
Its been a sad 2 yrs for me after you left but I am moving along....and you wont want to see me mourning you for the rest of my life...I am sure you want me to move along too...
....I love you Mum....I love you so much....
The other day I saw an article that was written to Today's. It was written by a guy who wants to remember his Mum. It was on my birthday date that I spotted that article. I send my thoughts in too...to remember you by...I hope it gets published...
You left the very BEST for me MUM ! You left your GOOD NAME and LEGACY for me... I
You were the best Mum ! Just like the rest of the Mum's in this world...Love...
See ya on the 26.10.06
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